Christmas Magic

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. - Norman Vincent Peale 

This Weekend

On Friday afternoon, we pondered why there was a stroller, with a child in it, in the middle of a football field.

We realized that bedding was just as happy as us to see sunshine.

We strolled the waterfront, taking a few pit stops along the way.

We watched locals wait for the catch of the day to arrive...

...and old men complete their daily exercise regime.

While climbing, a kid realized this statue was an epic slide as well.

On Saturday, we caught these boys hiding and smoking cigarettes behind our apartment. Nothing says cool like sneaking cigarettes and listening to Gangnam Style on repeat.

Sunday afternoon, we attended the grand opening of a new Starbucks. It is true; they proliferate like bunnies.

That night, Zach judged a business negotiation competition while I watched a magic show.

Just another active weekend in Zhanjiang. 

So Far This Month

Lamentations about life moving quickly can be rather redundant and cliche, yet there are profound moments when I find myself staring into nothing contemplating the swift speed of days...or months. This past weekend, Zach and I stood in front of our calendar, mouths agape. Whereas we are fully prepared for the spring semester to fly, we were not ready for this fall semester to follow suit. Zach is in the throes of proctoring his final exam and I will listen to ninety demonstrative speeches next week. Furthermore, by this time in years past, we have a plan for our holiday travel - as of today, we have not even booked one ticket by air, bus, train or boat. The realization of a fleeing semester was evident on our faces as we stood before our calendar. Thus, before we become bombarded with brown paper bags, mounds of paperwork, and endure a good bout of fist-shaking-cussing-at-the-crashed-computer-system, I wanted to take a moment to record our month so far.

SHERATON STAYCATION

For four years, we watched it be built. We vowed that when it finally was completed and opened, we would spend a weekend. Thanks to our annual sports extravaganza, we found ourselves ensconced within the luxurious Sheraton hotel that now towers over the Jinshawan beach. For three days/two nights, we moved from hot tub to pool to hot tub to awesome locker room shower to breakfast buffet to bathtub to cozy couch overlooking the bay. We read, laughed, relaxed, enjoyed afternoon tea and felt rejuvenated to face the remainder of the semester upon leaving Sunday afternoon.

CULINARY CREATIVITY

While experimenting in the kitchen has always been a favorite pastime of mine, living in China has forced me to face a plethora of new ingredients as well as figure out how to create some of our favorite dishes without the luxury of a mega grocery store. While I still look at the dried bark aisle with trepidation, this month I have conquered beets and persimmons. 

One of our senior students wanted to learn how to make borscht. While beets are not sold here, the magical land of Taobao produced a box of beautiful beets. We loved the soup and Zach continually gagged. I am still baffled that a man who can eat crickets and yak tongue swoons and dramatically gags at the sight of pickled beets. 

However, there was no gagging upon eating persimmon cookies and a loaf of persimmon bread. Zach loved them so much he has already requested more be made. I agree with his assessment and look forward to future adventures with the orange blobs. 

GRADUATION PHOTOS

It is mayhem on campus once the seniors decide to take senior photos. It is over the top and ridiculous - most classes will spend a minimum of six hours, with most taking twelve hours. On these days we try to steer clear of the prime photo stops. If we do not, we could be trapped in a revolving photo shoot - like the other day when we walked across the plaza and a group of senior English majors spotted us and came running. While most of the students have not even spoken to us in the two years since we had them, they were determined that we had to take a photo with them. 

However, every year we do have students who have stayed in contact with us; some even moving from student to friend. When they ask to take a photo, we oblige. This year we have had numerous requests, though the funniest one was from our Kingdom Girls. (One of the girls is named King.) They did not want a quick photo shoot, but rather a dress up session. For them, we agreed, but set a time limit in the negotiations. Thus, we found ourselves one sunny afternoon dressed in traditional clothing, snapping photos, and ultimately becoming a spectacle because foreigners dressed as Chinese is just really funny.

 

ANNUAL FRONT YARD LIGHTING CEREMONY

Gavin led the charge once again in turning our front yard into a (tropical) winter wonderland. Colored lights joined the display this year, as did a few more decorators. Alex and I took to decorating the lights with gusto, while Masha beautified the bushes. Gavin was in charge of the wiring because he really is an electricity junkie. The lighting was met with oohs and aahs by those passing by and it has since become the couple strolling lane. We love standing in our hallways watching those who pause to snap pictures or squeal with delight alongside their friends. There have even been a few children who have filled our yard with giggles and squeaky shoes.

STRAWBERRY PICKING

Strawberry season in Zhanjiang is a blink-and-it-is-gone season. Zach and I still laugh about our first year here when we completely missed eating strawberries because we thought the berries would be in the market for months. While deeply saddened by our lack of strawberry eating, we were completely fascinated with the entire strawberry business. 

Instead of year-round strawberry patches, local farmers create insta-fields. One day, remnants of a rice paddy, the next, mounded rows covered in black plastic with strawberry plants plopped on the top. It is actually a very bizarre farming method. Were do the plants come from? How can they produce strawberries so quickly? Is it actually safe to put an insta-patch where a large garbage pile stood the day before? 

Yes, that last one is true. No, I did not eat strawberries knowingly from that patch. 

Ultimately, I am not sure I want to investigate fully the insta-patch method, so I blindly indulge my strawberry love from the red morsels beautifully piled in the market.

Until this year. 

These patches are open to U Pick, which is what I spent a Saturday morning doing alongside some very giggly girls. Donning our neon blue mud boots, we took to the field with foraging gusto. The owners were thrilled to have such a fun group in their field, plus the foreigner made a few locals stop, stare, and even buy. 

Even though I had told the girls that I had done u pick fruit many, many times in America and had grown up on a farm, their exclamations over my full basket were baffling and hilarious. I was dubbed the winner of a contest I did not even know existed. Nonetheless, we returned to campus toting a lot of yummy strawberries. 

Double Decorating Happiness

In a scramble to leave the country in June, a fellow teacher bestowed upon Zach and I boxes filled with random goodness. Handing us one box, he said, "My girlfriend bought this tree for me on Taobao. I didn't want it, but she did it anyway. You take it." We said we would probably pass it on, but would take it off his hands. In the bustle of end of semester craziness, I stashed the box on the top of our bookcase and forgot about it.

After our Thanksgiving feast, I declared Saturday the day of Christmas decorating. In pulling out our meager decorations, I found the stashed box. Since it was still in our possession, I decided to open it and see what it contained.

It was a Christmas present in of itself!

Lights, metallic gold balls. glittery gold stars, gold and silver tinsel, and an array of silver and gold decorating knickknacks exploded from the box.

Hidden beneath was a full size Christmas tree.

I teared up.

It has been years since we had a full size Christmas tree. Plus, I recalled that at the end of last year's festivities, Zach and I had a conversation how our little tree was groaning beneath the increasing number of ornaments we have gained. It seems a surprise solution was given.

As for our faithful petite tree, it became the Christmas tree bedazzled with the new festive lights and kitschy gold decorations, standing proud in front of our bedroom window for all to see.

Happy Birthday, Eva and Bonano!

I love helping throw surprise birthday parties for our students and this one was no different. Complete with a life-size minion for our minion-obsessed Bonano and a cuddle pillow for Eva with her idol's face, our evening was filled with so much laughter and many pictures. 

Happy 80th Anniversary, GDOU!

The anniversary festivities kicked off in the traditional Chinese way with a singing competition. For the past two months, many of our Chinese teacher friends have been sucked into a rehearsal vortex. Many asked as to why we did not have to participate, to which I would respond that the leaders did not think my Chinese was good enough to sing Chinese propaganda songs. Sometimes being a foreigner has its perks. When our friends asked if we could come cheer for them, we heartily agreed.

While we know the basic concept of Chinese singing competitions, we were not sure what this one would one entail. It had the air of being a bit more formal and we knew that whatever group was attached to the party would win (and it did). However, we were not truly prepared for how much fun it ended up being. Within ten minutes of arriving, I was chatting with an 82 year old retired teacher who was feisty and looked not a day over 60. Once the curtain rose, the costumes alone were enough to keep us in stitches, but the gusto and determination that each group had towards their task was entertaining. The sports faculty made a grand entrance that included a nearly naked bodybuilder (who I know) and a scuba diver (who I also know).

I love the sports faculty.

We had initially planned to stay only through the foreign language faculty's performance, but after one group, we were captivated and in it until the end. It was a thoroughly entertaining evening and we were excited to see what would follow in anniversary activities.

Days later, we sat in the same auditorium to watch the arts college perform a compilation of odes for our beloved school. It was touted on the tickets as beautiful, fancy lights and endearing. There was definitely beauty and fancy LED screens with bad quality doves on them, but its endearing quality was not what we expected. By the second song, Zach and I looked at each other, mouths agape. The arts college, whose sole purpose is to study stage work in dancing and singing, was lip syncing. Our first clue was a choir singing with no microphones on stage, but the second song with a soloist who closed her mouth while words were still coming through the sound system was definite proof to the situation. Nonetheless, it was a good performance, we enjoyed it, and we learned after the show that lip syncing is very common in China.

 
While the pomp and circumstance of wining and dining graduates, donors, and mysterious foreigners (who we never met nor were asked to meet) was in full force Friday and Saturday, we enjoyed stumbling upon opening ceremonies for random new campus features and joining in fringe activities meant to make the students seem involved in the hoopla.

We definitely got the better end of deal with freedom to come and go. On Saturday, I started my day in a dragonboat, while Zach spent the morning on the football pitch. We watched the University Cup final football match that afternoon.

We realized that this anniversary was really the equivalent of an American university's homecoming. While America does it every year, China does it every ten. Our campus was bustling with visitors from near and far; I met many graduates, saw a couple of our former students, and had numerous RFPs snapped by those astonished to see a foreigner walking the campus or in a dragonboat. Zach said he had similar encounters.

Overall, it was a busy and delightful weekend. While I am not one to be gungho about pomp and circumstance and schmoozing leaders, I did enjoy celebrating this university. In GDOU, we found the overseas experience we desired, found a niche in teaching, have thrived, and fallen even more in love with a wild and bizarre country and its culture. GDOU has been good to us and for us these past five years and for that, I will celebrate.  

Ba Guan: A Case of the Purple Dots

It is not uncommon to see circular purple splotches on necks, backs and upper arms in this area. When I first arrived in Zhanjiang, it was a bizarre sight that repeatedly made me stare in wonder as to what could create such ugly blotches. Of course, I put whatever it was on my Chinese bucket list because, if it was so popular, it needed to be tried.

Five years later, that opportunity arose. In these five years I have received a variety of reasons as to why ba guan (English translation: cupping) is done. The root of the act is immersed within the belief of qi and inner feng shui, but the result explanations range from "it makes you comfortable" to "it takes away the bad things."

A new shop opened on campus which offered the ba guan service, so joined by two senior friends, Ruby and Cindy, we spent our Friday evening trying it out. Zach and I opted for ba guan, Cindy opted to do nothing, and Ruby chose another method called scraping.

Ruby's method was crazy, very painful, and not something I added to my Chinese bucket list.

Zach and I each spent fifteen minutes being sucked dry by heated cups. I expected for it to be hot, a bit uncomfortable, and as relaxing as a massage. Instead, it was itchy, a weird sensation of my skin being pulled, not really that relaxing, and I was so thirsty afterwards.

Though it was far from what I expected, it was not a dismal experience but rather quite enjoyable. The boss was delightful and she enjoyed explaining the process to us, all while laughing at Ruby yelling how much her procedure hurt. She did repeatedly say that Zach and I were very healthy and muscular, so we may not have good results.

Would I do it again? Probably not, as I think a monthly massage is more my niche of Chinese medicine. Do I regret doing ba guan? No, it was worth it just to see the look on students' and teachers' faces as I walked by with circular purple splotches on my neck, back, and upper arms. 

Construction Crazy

It appears that a typhoon combined with an 80th anniversary is the perfect recipe for construction chaos. What the typhoon did not destroy, the administration did in an overarching scheme of beautifying the campus. Our morning alarm clock has been backhoes, sputtering chainsaws, or squabbling old men pulling wheelbarrows by the hutong. There are so many sand dunes on campus that children are toting shovels and cups as though they are on a beach.

While a few construction projects have been years in the making (such as the plaza in front of the main building), others have a rather impromptu feeling to them. For example, the dirt path pictured above was actually a concrete road three hours before I took this picture. I went to the swimming pool walking on a concrete road and returned to crushed mayhem.

The road returned the next day, giving no clue as to why it was destroyed in the first place.

After years of watching backhoes sporadically pull and push dirt around, a miracle occurred this week - trees were planted. Actual trees.

I was stunned.

In all my years of living here, not once have I actually seen a tree planted.

Plus, it was a learning experience for palm tree planting is an intense process involving a crane, a backhoe, lots of wire, and many hand-waving, yelping, jumping up-and-down men.

After the trees came a planting frenzy. In our area there are only four types of plants that get planted, as I think they are the cheapest and the most hospitable towards mosquito habitats. Once the hillside was planted, our second and greatest shock came.

GDOU planted grass.

Green grass.

Real grass.

China has a great aversion to grass. After reading a couple of historical books, I believe it stems from the Cultural Revolution days when it was decreed that grass must be pulled out as it was seen as luxurious. Granted, this is my theory, but I have never seen or experienced a culture that was so hostile towards the lush green goodness. Therefore, to actually see our university plant it was on par with water becoming wine.

Within the last couple of days, it has been a frenzy to finish projects with many workers pulling over-nighters. Most of these all nighters have revolved around the plethora of statues that now grace our campus. Our joke with students is that the university found an amazing deal on Taobao during the Singles Day shopping frenzy, perhaps a buy-one-get-one-free arrangement. We have a good laugh and now look upon the likes of Confucius to Mr. Magellan Magellan.

Yes, Magellan Magellan is the name on the statue. The following paragraph about his sailing feats is just as grammatically correct.

While we are happy that our campus is indulging in some cosmetic improvements, we are also experiencing a bit of grumpiness alongside the students. Misused funds are always hard to stomach. Most computers and projectors do not work in the classrooms, yet new (pointless) statues dot the campus grounds. There is a new model of the school in the administration building but the actual buildings have mold on the walls and the ceilings are falling down. Everything is newly painted, but we know maintenance does not happen in this country, so all that is new will be rusted and derelict in about three months. On most days we do not have running water in the teaching building, but a new fountain was built. Granted, the fountain will never run unless a VIP is within eye shot, but it was built.

Yet for all our skepticism and hilarious conversations with students, it is fun to watch the build up for the 80th anniversary and how hard everyone works to prepare the great facade. 

Foreign Language Football Team: History Was Made

History had been made, so the girls sadly walked off the field.

With the final whistle, the Foreign Language girls team had won their first game ever in the university cup. While Zach and his co-coaches gave whoops of joy and clapped vivaciously along with the spectators, the girls hung their heads. It was a bizarre scene to observe, one that they would try to explain later as their time of coping with such an unexpected moment.

Zach was perplexed.

I was perplexed.

Bystanders were perplexed.

Zach was stunned that cheers of delight had resounded after the tied game the previous week, yet moping was the choice after a win.

I joked that perhaps he had not explained the game well enough, thus the girls were confused what the word winning actually meant in football.

Eventually smiles emerged and satisfaction was felt for what the season had been - which was remarkable. For the second year, Zach worked tirelessly alongside the girls, teaching the basics of football, as well as tactics and maneuvers. The improvement from last year was great; the improvement from the beginning of the semester to the final game was staggering. The interest in playing for the team was so abundant that Zach had enough players for two teams.

As a spectator, I loved watching Zach thrive in this coaching niche, I was mesmerized by the vast improvement and the great attitude of the players, and I am impressed by the growing interest for female football on this campus. This year, I saw a group of girls go from being perceived as the inferior team of the competition to the feared. Post tournament, they have become instigators for keeping the girl teams still playing in practice games.

History is becoming a legacy and that is keeping heads held high and smiles abundant. 

Puppy Love

It was to be a quick jaunt home, but, before reaching our front walkway, I saw three girls scrambling with a trashcan. I stopped when I saw one pull a puppy from inside, all while tears streamed down her face.

"Where did that come from?" I exclaimed.

"I don't know! There are three!" she responded.

Within in a couple of minutes, three black, squirmy pups plopped into our lives.

While I am still very much a cat person, I cannot deny that puppy cuddles and antics have been a fun bonus to our days. I do miss having a pet and the moments we get to spend watching them grow, squirm, fuss, suckle, and play have filled that void, even if it is for a short time. 

Halloween Extravaganza

Last year, the administration deemed Halloween night the perfect night to host a mandatory translation lecture for our students. In an effort to thwart diversionary tactics this year, we opted to host our trick-or-treating extravaganza on October 30 and asked students to keep the time and date a bit mum. Ironically, a few of our new teachers got wind of our annual event and began a crusade of inviting as many people as possible. Eventually, we had to tell them they were responsible for handing candy to their students and invitees. It tamed their inviting gusto, but did not dampen their enthusiasm. Actually, we found it to be an exciting prospect to have fellow foreigners join the fun.

Gavin was adamant that mood lighting be provided, which in turn inspired me to craft some decorations. The moment of administration opposition came in the form of landscapers and hedge trimmers at 7:30am on Friday. Thursday night we had draped the bushes with red lights, commenting that we liked the ragged, non-landscaped look for such a ghoulish evening (as our bushes had not been trimmed all semester). Of course, during our decorating party, we noticed our resident spy across the way watching.

As I put in my contacts the next morning, I heard the failed attempts of a gas powered hedge trimmer. I looked outside and saw the potential demise of our lighting. I yelled at Zach, who made a mad dash down the stairs. A cranky trimmer saved the day; he was able to strip the bushes and return to the apartment before the trimming of the verge commenced. Gavin's WeChat messages filled with expletives and disbelief were the added bonus to the situation. Nonetheless, disaster was averted and I re-draped the lights after class.

At 8:30pm, our front yard became a hopping party. Donned in our Chinese-inspired costumes, we welcomed the frenzy, answering calls of "trick-or-treat" with handfuls of candy. We had to filter requests, though, making sure our students were priority in receiving confectionery goodness. While we had forewarned our newbies that a lot of candy was needed, they quickly ran out, much to the chagrin of their students.

It was an excellent evening, our grandest yet. The students had a fantastic time, hundreds of pictures were snapped, and screams of surprise with Gavin and Connor's costume reminded me that I truly love cross-cultural moments such as this. 

Skype Snapshots

My gratitude for Skype is unending. While our internet may be horrid and connections faulty most days, the moments we can spend with friends and family on the other side of the globe via a computer screen is invaluable. The laughter, the silliness, the tours through forts, stories involving castles and crazy cats, fashion shows, and even an explanation of buying bagels at the bagel store are life giving. 

Finding the secret snapshot stash days later provides another dose of laughter and gratitude.

Happy Birthday, Masha!

We spent a spectacular Wednesday evening on the front lawn celebrating Masha turning seventeen. As always, it was amazing food, amazing dessert, lots of laughter with some very dear friends. 

Association Exhibition

This year marks the 80th anniversary of Guangdong Ocean University, therefore anything remotely associated with the university is uber-hyped. The great part is that events that we loved our first couple of years here but were scrapped with the Great Corruption Purge have returned.

Last night we stumbled across the dress rehearsal (thinking it was the actual performance) of the exhibition of campus clubs. Enjoying the preview so much, we returned tonight to watch the actual pomp and circumstance which included sights of flying drones from the engineering club to a traditional lion dance. Not only is the evening a great reminder of what activities take place on our campus, but it gives us a chance to see where our new students are involved.

Windows Are a Beautiful Thing

Two swirling cloud masses in the Pacific Ocean garnered mass attention. Still limping from a direct hit, the prospect of two was daunting. One night, Zach and I stood admiring our typhoon modern art with the satellite image on his phone. 

A glance at the screen.

The next glance at our mangled windows. 

A glance at the screen.

Another glance at the mangled windows. 

We started calculating what it would take to dismantle in order to put up sheets of plastic. 

Since living in China, I have learned that the Philippines is the spring board for all typhoons, It does not matter where in the Pacific a brewing storm is located, it will find a direct path to mass of islands. After is floods and maims, it will take one of three paths - northward to Taiwan and the east coast of China, southward towards Vietnam, or directly between the two towards Hainan and our little peninsula. 

While chances were slim that we would take another direct hit, chances are unpredictable. Plus, our no windows status was just the right thing to ensure that we would get hit with dose of heavy rain and winds. While we schemed about a demo job and scouted where to buy tarps, our lack of windows garnered attention from others. Students, friends, and colleagues were especially stunned that nothing had been done to at least make the situation safer. 

Zach's writing assistant, Emma, asked the repairman who was in charge of our building while he was fixing their hot water heater. He said, "Not me" followed by, "I don't know who is in charge." 

On Thursday, our friend, Michelle, walked by our building and decided to take matters into her own hands. She called the campus repair office. Somehow our boss, Carrie, got involved so that on Friday, we received a text from her saying: "The order of repairs is student services, classrooms, then your apartment." 

We received this notice while eating lunch. Stunned and a bit miffed, Zach responded with, "So next semester."

We laughed. 

He sent a follow up message that read, "Can we at least have someone come to take down the metal and remaining glass or do Amanda and I need to do that?"

Silence. 

That night at 10pm, Carrie called to say that cleaners would be at our apartment at 9am. Bewildered, Zach reiterated that we did not need cleaners. She said OK and hung up. After some discussion, we decided we needed Chinese-language backup for the morning and Zach sent a plea on WeChat. We had visions of cackling Chinese women overrunning our hutong with buckets and hoses. 

At 9am, Cheryl showed up. Ten minutes later, our favorite repairman and two ladders appeared. He leaned the ladders against the wall and said, "They will be here later."

He ran out the door before we could get a timetable on the reference to later. 

Flabbergasted, Zach, Cheryl, and I stood in the living room, staring at each other. We dissolved into a fit of laughter. We agreed that later would be around 5pm. Oh, China. 

Zach returned to a Skype conversation.

Cheryl and I took to Taibao to replace destroyed items. 

To our surprise, two men strolled through our door at 10am. 

Dismantling became shoving it back into place. Even Cheryl was stunned by the turn of events. At times, I think the workers wished it was a dismantling job rather than a rebuilding one with each grunt and groan. 

At noon, frames had been resurrected and the workers left for lunch. We thought the job was done, so we were shocked when they came waltzing up the stairs at half past two toting glass. Windows were completely unexpected, but our excitement was short lived when they realized they was cut way too small. 

They left. We resigned ourselves once more to life without windows. 

At 4:30pm, they reappeared with bigger panes of glass. In awe, we watched normalcy return to the hutong. Windows are a beautiful thing. 

After their departure and a round of deep cleaning, Zach texted Carrie to share our gratitude for a task that far exceeded our expectations. Her reply?

"Good, it was supposed to have been fixed last week."

Seriously, there are days we just do not get this country.